Empathy Isn’t Just for Clients and Customers
“We definitely have empathy for our clients, but we don’t give it to our coworkers in other departments.”
I heard this statement during a Lead Boldly experience Emotional Intelligence audit I conducted recently. This human services organization does critical work within the community. They rightfully take a great deal of pride in the care they give their clients. However, they quickly identified that they do not show the same empathy to their coworkers, including top leaders.
As VP of HR, I received a call from a colleague requesting a salary comparison for a replacement position. I asked them to complete the form and submit it through the process and they did. Less than 24 hours later, the team member handling comps got a call asking about the status of that salary comparison. The team member came to me stressed and pressured by the call because they had 3 other comps ahead of this one. My colleague thought only of their department’s needs and desired timeline. They gave no consideration to the workload or priorities of their colleagues on the HR team. This happens every day.
In fact, multiple teams in different fields have given the same responses during this Emotional Intelligence audit exercise. These folks were not an exception.
It reminded me of an ex-boyfriend who approached me years after we broke up and apologized for how he treated me. He said, “in therapy I learned that I treat strangers better than the people I care about.”
It seems it is easy to take the people we work with for granted, not fully considering the impact of our actions on them. Empathy among coworkers is an essential element of trust and a positive work environment, which help to drive effective programs, services, and overall outcomes.
Here are 3 benefits to taking the time to care for our coworkers the way we serve our clients and customers:
Better Communication: Cognitive empathy allows us to think through and try to understand our colleagues’ perspectives, needs, and concerns. This leads to more communication, better listening, and fewer misunderstandings and conflict. When conflicts arise, empathy is a tool for resolving issues by seeing the issues from different perspectives resulting in the opportunity to discover beneficial solutions.
More Collaboration: Increased understanding through empathy makes collaborative work with colleagues more inviting and easier. This leads to better relationships, more trust, and an increased positive outcome.
Less Stress: In an empathetic workplace colleagues can trust one another to share their needs. This can reduce workplace stress because people know that they can seek and receive help and compassion rather than judgment, comparison, and condemnation.
Empathy is a strategic interpersonal skill that will significantly impact your relationships, stress level, professional success, and work environment. Seeking to understand others and why they may feel, respond, and act as they do benefits us as individuals and our organizations.